Help for Elliott and his twin Kathy Praise

Hello Everyone!

Here's the latest on baby Elliott.

Baby Elliott has been going through ups and downs the past few days. On Friday he had a few seizures and prior to that I noticed a "fluttering" of his arms and legs. He was in terrible pain from muscle spasms that overtook his entire body. I'm not going to lie to you, it has been rough. I sedated him so that his body could relax and made the decision to continue sedating him every 4-6 hours as he needed it.

We had a glimmer of hope when his little arms and legs that had been stuck in the same positions since we got him became completely limp and he was able to move them on his own. We cried, we praised, we hugged everyone over and over. He stayed this way for almost 48 hours and we were so happy. 

This afternoon all of that changed again. He woke up from his nap with his "I'm in pain" cry. when I went to pick him up his arms were once again rigid and upright, his hands in tiny fists that could not be opened. His legs were a little bit mobile but still stiff as a board. We tried unsuccessfully for 30 minutes or so to calm him down but it was evident that he was in too much pain. Back to the sedation we go. You should know that this has been the hardest part of this journey for me. I HATE drugs and I hate them for children even more. The first time we sedated him, I was sitting on the hospital floor with my head on my fellow Missionary's knee crying and praying. (Elliott was in her lap waiting for the drugs to kick in. I was laying hands on him and praying) I kept asking God if there was any other way. Why could he not do a miracle in Elliott's life and heal him? Why does a child so young have to suffer so needlessly? At this point, his body had serious spasms every 3-5 minutes. It doesn't make sense to me. It still doesn't.

Saturday morning I went to the orphanage to see his twin sister, Kathy Praise. We noticed the slight flutters in her hands on a previous visit but didn't think too much about it until Elliott started doing the same thing. I brought her home with me for her to visit her brother. The health differences between were blatantly obvious. She outweighs him by a lot. She kicks her legs, waves her arms and babbles like a normal baby. It was also obvious that she can see. Elliott can not.

Her entire body "flutters" periodically as well as her right arm which flutters every few minutes. This was so strange to me. The most similar thing I have seen is Parkinson's. I have never seen it in an infant. We talked to the orphanage Directors about taking both children to have brain scans to see if we can get an accurate diagnosis and if something can be done.

We need your help in so many ways:

• Prayer - prayers for healing, prayers for wisdom for us as caretakers and for all of the Medical Personnel involved. Prayer for our hearts because this is              one of the most difficult situations I have ever faced.

• Networking - I need to talk with Doctors in the U.S. who may have a better sense of what is going on and can give us some more direction. If you know a Pediatric Neurologist that may be willing to talk with us, I need to get in touch with them right away. Every moment counts.

• Finances - all of this is taking money that we didn't budget for and the costs are about to increase. There is a Pediatric Hospital in Yaounde (6 hours away) that has Neurologists. In addition to the kids medical bills,  food, diapers etc. we will need money for transportation and possibly housing while they are being treated. I have no idea what to tell you we will need. I just don't know at this point. What I do know is that these kids need help immediately and God has placed us here to see that they get what they need. Any amount you can give will be appreciated and when I have actual costs I will be sure to let you know what they are. There is a donate button attached to this email from an account with the National Christian Foundation that I created years ago to help the people of Cameroon. Any gifts made are 100% tax deductible.
  

• Medical Personnel - I am looking for Doctors and Nurses who are interested in coming to Cameroon to help with Medical Clinics as well as long term  Medical Missionaries.
• Contractor's, people with knowledge of digging wells, and people with expertise in Solar and/or Wind Energy
  

Please pray for Elliott and Praise. They are suffering.

If you know of American Missionaries who are serving in Cameroon, who may have connections to other American Doctor's please forward this information on.

Feel free to send this email to all of your friends who may know other's that can help.

All of this renews my passion to build a Medical Clinic here in this Community. There is a church in Iowa that is planning to come in March 2013 to help erect our first temporary Medical Clinic. We already have land here in Cameroon. I was going to wait until I come home in July to begin fundraising but stay tuned... You will hear more.

If you are interested in donating you can always mail a check to:

National Christian Foundation

11625 Rainwater Drive, Suite 500
Alpharetta, GA 30009

be sure to write McLean Missions Fund  and what the money is for on the Memo line.

Thanks for your prayers and your support on this journey God has called me to!

Elliott Update

Third Post sent Wednesday April 11, 2012

Just came home from several hours at the hospital and pharmacy with Elliott. His little body was full of spasms from the Tetanus. He has been sedated to help reduce the amount of pain he is in. He has eaten a bit better today. about 6 oz. 1.5-2 oz. at a time. We were unable to get a clear chest X-ray to rule out pneumonia but he is breathing better. Thanks for the prayers and keep them coming!

S.O.S. for Elliott 2

second post sent on Tuesday April 10, 2012

please send up some prayers for Elliott. He isn't breathing well and hasn't eaten most of the afternoon/evening.  He seems to be in tremendous pain, and we can't figure out why. It's after midnight here and I can't take him to a hospital right away...

We need some healing prayers said over him ASAP.

My prayer is that he makes it through the night and I can get help for him early in the morning. It takes a lot for me to be afraid. My trust is in the Lord...

thanks. I will update when I can.

S.O.S. for Elliott

Here begins a series of blogs that I sent out as email but wasn't able to post here... I will continue to update as Elliott's story unfolds...

first blog - Thursday April 5, 2012

I am in one of my least favorite places... An African Hospital...

Don't worry, this isn't going to be the usual rant about how much I hate medical care in Third World Countries....

Elliott is at 4 month old baby boy. He and his twin sister, Praise were born Dec. 3, 2011. They were abandoned by their mother for reason's that are unknown to me. They live at one of the orphanages I do work with here in Cameroon. They have been there since Dec. 16, 2011.

While visiting the orphanage yesterday I noticed his little body stiff as a board. His hands were drawn up and twisted in an nu-natural way and his fingers would not extend. His legs were crossed at the ankle and he didn't move unless you moved him.  Another child came to feed him and food just fell out of his mouth. His breathing wasn't clear and he was crying.

If you know me at all, you can imagine what was going on inside of me. I was crazy. I called for the nurse, I called for the care-takers and I called for the Director to find out what happened. God has done a miracle in my life with the fact that I didn't scream and yell... The child didn't look like this the last time I saw him. After getting flimsy explanations for what was going on, I looked for my phone to call my trusted Cameroonian Doctor. He was away at a medical conference and I wasn't able to reach him.

Fortunately for me, my fellow Missionary and next door neighbor is an American Dr. I described what I saw to her and after consulting my favorite Cameroonian nurse, we headed to the orphanage for a consultation and trip to the local hospital. Elliott was basically the same when we got back but now he was also burning up with fever.... We headed up the mountain to the hospital...

Kudos to the staff at the hospital, they treated him immediately without payment up front.... Sadly, 3 American's coming in with a Cameroonian infant makes a big difference. There is no expectation that you will not pay... The same was true today when I took him for his chest X-ray. The technician called us back and asked for a receipt for the X-ray up front. I told him I had already paid a deposit for services and they can deduct their fee from it. He looked at me quizzically and said, "Are you Cameroonian?" NOPE. Are you a Black American? YEP. O.K. I will do it because I am sure that you will pay. I will take your medical card after we do the X-ray and confirm with the cashier."  Thank you very much.... I appreciate the service but the death glares from the 40 or so others in the waiting room, not so much...  It's not right. Prejudice is prejudice, but I needed this child to be seen and treated immediately. 

He was 4 months old as of yesterday. He weighed a whopping 4 kilo's which is around 8 pounds. This is the size of a new-born... I was only slightly mean with the nurse who was trying to take his blood. Gentle, gentle I kept saying.... I could feel my fellow Missionary telling me to shush in her head... don't aggravate them Toya, let them do their job... Yeah sure, taking blood with no gloves, without washing hands and placing the IV needle on a dirty table...sure I won't aggravate them... I will admit, I was much nicer that I usually am with hospital staff. Pray for me. I don't have patience when the lives of innocent children are at stake.

Today has been a bit rough. Elliott has screamed for a good portion of the day. He refused food and water until about 2 this afternoon. I finally got him to drink 2 oz. of milk. He is now sleeping soundly. After being on IV fluids for about 16 hours, the Dr. has taken him off and given him a break. He wants to see how much food he will eat and my goal is to get him to take at least 5 bottles... so far, not so good.

Please send up some prayers for Mr. Elliott... He needs to eat. We need to find out why he doesn't want to eat and what has caused this overall problem. I'm also almost positive that he can't see. Praying that this is a temporary neurological problem with everything else that is going on.

He is a sweetheart. He loves to be sang to and he loves to rock. He has to be on his belly to be comfortable. Being on his back or his side is terrible, the screaming escalates... I have figured out how to feed him while he is facing me. This has been the only way he eats and doesn't throw up.  PROGRESS. His little arms and legs were a bit more flexible today so I'm thanking God for answered prayers already.

I ordered a crib to be made so that I can take him home with me when he's discharged. That's going to be fun. I'm sure my heart and the hearts of my fellow Missionaries will break even more with him in the house.

Pray for my heart as I am extremely angry with this situation. It doesn't make sense to me that a child can be in this much pain and no one does anything about it. My attitude with his former care-takers is not a good one right now. I don't think I will ever get answers but for now, I will do what needs to be done to take care of this sweet little child.

Pray for WISDOM for the Medical Staff, pray for Healing, pray that Elliott will begin to eat and the rigidness of his body will go away. Pray for broken hearts and pray for the children all over the world who are being mistreated and don't have someone to fight on their behalf...

Water, Water, Water!!!!!!!!!!!!

It's 4 a.m. and as I lay here in bed, I can't stop crying...

Ironically, it's water on my brain that is making the tears fall. We are not talking about Hydrocephalus (literal water on the brain) but for the past week or so Water, or lack of it, has been very heavily on my mind.

We are experiencing a water crisis here in Cameroon. In some ways there is always a water crisis because there is a lack of accessibility to clean water in this country. The water is here under the ground but ways to get to it are few and far between.

If you are fortunate to have access to Water in your home, it is rationed by the local government. In our case, we had water from 6 a.m. - 2 or 3 p.m. every other day. These days we  don't have water at all because a pipe burst sometime last week and has left our city without.

There is a part of me that wonders if it would really matter if the pipe had burst or not. As I ride in taxi's around town, I see lines of people sitting on empty water containers at public taps waiting on water to come. The taps in many areas are DRY, DRY, DRY. We are in dry season. A few weeks ago it rained for 3 days. This was the first rain since November. It hasn't rained since those glorious 3 days. It always looks as if it will but nothing comes of it.

So the past week has been all about where to get water, how much water we can get and using it in the most efficient ways possible so that it lasts as long as possible. What does this look like? We don't flush toilets unless we absolutely have to. I cook giant pots of food for both houses. My neighbors (fellow Missionaries) washed everyone's dishes in 2 houses and then used the rinse water to flush the toilet. We bathe as little as possible but as often as we can. Our floors are terribly dirty because we live at the top of an extremely dusty hill and carrying water in and out has increased the traffic but we aren't mopping right now. (that's a luxury) One of my fellow Missionaries drove around for more than 10 hours looking for water and bringing it back to our 2 houses. He carried gallons and gallons of water up the stairs and filled waiting buckets. I could go on and on...

On our last water day when water did not come yet again, we were talking back and forth to each other on facebook about our lack of water. I jokingly posted, who wants to donate to the "buy the missionaries a water tank fund?" At the time, we thought that the government was rationing water a bit more than usual. We were wrong.

In midst of running around looking for water and discussing ways to save it, I received a message from my Pastor. He wanted to know what was going on and if he could help. I outlined what was happening and gave him various solutions to "our problem." What happened next was nothing short of a modern day miracle. I went to bed after sending him the email. (It was late at night in Cameroon.) I woke up the next morning to news that the church had raised enough money for a water tank for BOTH of our houses and for barrels to store water until the crisis is over. All of this in a matter of hours while I was sleeping!

I was completely blown away. Don't get me wrong. This is pretty much normal behavior for my church family. When people are in trouble, they move. That's just who they are but for some reason this floored me. As I walked next door with my laptop in my hand, I couldn't speak. I told my fellow missionaries, look at this message. Are you serious? This is really happening? They know that they are helping us too?? Yep, it's real, it's happening and yes they understand that this is for all of us not just me. Wow, wow, wow was what I heard over and over. God you really are just that good is what we kept saying. I'm not sure why we were so surprised. We teach people everyday about how much God loves them and He's a good Father that will take care of His children. We know this but sometimes we forget.

So as I write this, there is a 2,000 liter water tank with a giant lock and chain around it, tied to our apartment building. (We don't want it stolen before it can be installed)

While I was out purchasing a water tank and the things necessary to make it work properly, one of my fellow Missionaries made a road trip to Douala because our ship had literally come in. People sent us things from America last November and we were finally able to pick them up. She came home with 8 boxes of canning jars for me and various donations for the kids in orphanages that I work with. I will now be able to teach people here how to preserve food and some very deserving kids will have underwear and socks. You have no idea how something so simple is so cherished here... Can you imaging not having water to drink or underwear to wear. It's a daily part of life here...

At one point I just sat on my chair and thanked God. He promised to take care of us? Why am I surprised? Why am I so fortunate? why did He choose me?

I woke up this morning with the same thoughts. While I'm grateful that we have a water tank, my mind can't stop thinking about all of the people who don't. When I went to the hospital yesterday afternoon, there was a line of buckets waiting at the tap that was dry... One woman sat there to be sure that as new people brought there buckets they took their rightful place in the line. I remembered my time living in the hospital with Achiever and having to pay someone to get buckets of water for us and bring them in because the taps were dry and we had been without water for days. In the 6 weeks or so that I lived in the hospital, I think the taps worked 5 or 6 days. When they came on people screamed and ran with their buckets. I remember one morning the water started flowing about 3 a.m. (Someone was sleeping outside) They were kind enough to come and wake people up because you never know how long the water will flow. People did not complain about being woken up, they danced, they sang and rejoiced as they filled their buckets.

This made me think about the Living Water. Jesus is the Living Water. He brings life to our dry souls. Without Him, we will die, literally and spiritually. Do we thirst for Him the way we thirst for physical water? Do we take Him for granted that He will always be there and assume our spiritual taps will never run dry? Do we wait until there is a shortage and there has to be an emergency filling of our spiritual tank? Do we rejoice with the opportunity to sit at His tap and get full? Don't wait until your soul has begun to wither and dry up. He is the LIVING WATER that will allow you to never thirst again but in order to never thirst, you have to DRINK!!

Christ loved us enough to die for us. He makes Himself available to us and chases after us. He won't force you to drink of the Living Water. We must make a choice. Will you drink or will you die?

The answers to all of my questions above have one simple answer. LOVE. I don't deserve anything God does for me. I don't have to do anything for it. He simply showers me with His love, because He's my Papa and He loves me.

I will continue to share His love with others and during the water crisis, I will take advantage of the opening I have to not only share the physical water that He has blessed us with... I will share about the LIVING WATER that will allow your soul to never thirst again.

Rozetta Baptist Church, I am eternally grateful to you for all that you do to show God's love to ME! You are one of a kind and I will never stop thanking God for putting you in my life. I am a better person because of all of you. In many ways, I had given up on people and their lack of love... You have demonstrated Christ's love in so many ways. Not only to me but to the community around you and Missionaries around the world.

Celebration Community Church - the sentiments are the same. Thank you for all the canning jars and supplies to teach the people of Cameroon.

Free Chapel Church - Singles in the Spirit Small Group, words cannot express. Thank you for all of the donations for the kids and the canning supplies and special thanks to Cynthia and Melissa for buying things, boxing it all up and driving all over Hotlanta to deliver them to the ship!

and many thanks to a special woman named Heather whom I have never met... Your gifts are amazing. Thanks for the canning stuff and the coffee! My fellow Missionary squealed with delight!

All of you are a blessing to me in so many ways. I don't know if words will ever be able to express the joy in my heart. So I sit here with tears in my eyes, so grateful that God would choose me and He would touch your hearts to partner with us here on the Mission field to share His wonderful Living Water with those around us!

Thank you! I love you all!

Beauty for Ashes

This has been an emotional week. I don't know that I can go into all the details to sum it up but I will share one story from the week.

I went to court in Cameroon for the first time. What an experience that was. The courthouse looks like a broken down building that we would have condemned in the U.S. Men and women sitting around in their black robes and fake George Washington wigs...scary It was an experience, I will leave it at that.

One of the inmates that I work with in the prison asked me to attend court to hear his sentencing. I wasn't sure why he wanted me there and what his expectations of me were, but he assured me that my presence alone would bring comfort to him, and he simply wanted someone else there to hear what the judge would say.

The Sunday prior to his sentencing, he asked me if I would do a favor for him. I looked at him quizzically and told him, it would depend on what he was asking. He asked if he could have the privilege of calling me mom. I was completely shocked. I asked what that meant. He said it was simply a sign of respect and it was the only thing he had to offer me. With tears in my eyes, I said yes. As I walked out of the jail, he called to me. "Mom you will come to court, yes??"  "Yes, I will be there."

So I prepared to go to court last Thursday morning. I arrived late because of transportation issues with other ministry that I'm involved in. By the time I arrived at the prison, the inmates going to court had been locked in a secure vehicle to take them there. This was new to me. Every other time I have seen inmates going to court, they walk with a few guards or the inmates themselves have to pay taxi fare to go. These particular inmates were "high risk" so they were in a very secure vehicle. I went to the guard to ask where the court was so that I could meet them there. He directed me and as I began to walk away, I heard frantic screams, "Mommy, Mommy, don't go!" I turned but could not see him, I simply responded, "I will meet you there. I am on my way to the courthouse, don't worry." There was absolute terror in his voice. I don't think I have ever heard an adult male so frightened and I wasn't quite sure what to do.

I made my way to the courthouse and stood outside, waiting for the prisoners to come. I stood there praying and I began to pace asking God, what do I do?, what does he need?, I am not equipped for this.

When the inmates arrived, they were in handcuffs and some in shackles. I had never seen Solomon in handcuffs and it literally broke my heart. The tears began to fall and I was again unsure of what I was doing there. I tried to collect myself to be strong for him.

We strolled to the courthouse "together." I sat in the courtroom opposite the inmates, so that he could see where I was. His eyes were red with tears. I have no idea how long he had been crying or all of the reasons why. He mouthed, Thank you, to me and my heart threatened to burst once more. My mind reeled, thank you for what? I haven't done anything. God help me to understand what is really needed here.

His case was the first called. The judge made a big show of reading through all of his paperwork from when he was first apprehended more than 2 years ago. I felt yucky listening and watching how much joy the judge seemed to take at talking about everything that had been done wrong. Solomon had told me his story of why he was there and what the judge said, matched almost exactly but it was the way that the judge took delight discussing it that made me a little bit crazy.

Solomon continued to turn around to look at me. I mouthed, it's o.k. I am praying. You are fine, you are strong. He had previously told me that he was ready to serve whatever sentence was given him. He said that coming to Prison actually changed his life because it was here that he met the real Jesus. He didn't think he would even still be alive if he hadn't come.

As the judge finished, he told Solomon that he could speak. Solomon was very humble and thanked the judge, told him once again that he was sorry for his crimes and grateful for the chance to be able to change his life. He said that he had learned many lessons while in prison.

Finally the judge pronounced his sentence. He was given four years and they deducted the 2.5 years that he has already spent in prison waiting for his sentence from this time. Salomon was overjoyed. He was previously worried about how long he would have, but the fact that he will get out and still be able to raise his young children, thrilled him.

He turned to me and smiled for the first time. When he got back to his seat, he put his hands in the prayer position and again mouthed thank you to me. I was so overwhelmed. I didn't know what to say or do. As I felt the tears start to form, I mouthed to him that I was leaving and I would see him next week.

My heart was un-done. I chose to walk and pray instead of getting in a taxi to my next destination.

The Lord reminded me of Isaiah 61 - where he promised Beauty for Ashes. I used to do a program for women who were hurting using these scriptures.

Do you think women are the only ones hurting, the Lord seemed to say to me. Do you think they are the only ones who need my comfort? I  began to weep. I didn't really have any answers. Of course, I know that isn't the case but sometimes, I forget.

We all need reminders sometimes. For me, I often wonder if what I'm doing is really making a difference. Sometimes, I feel as if I am not "working hard enough." I am not doing enough. There is much more that can be done. Most of the time I don't see the tangible results of what I do. I'm o.k. with that. I understand that I'm a seed planter and God brings the harvest. I may never know all that going to court or sharing time with inmates will do for them, but I do know what God is doing in me.

I love the changes that He's making in me and that He has given me a heart for hurting people. I admit, I don't always enjoy every aspect of ministry, but I enjoy knowing that God is healing the broken hearted, and freeing people from whatever prison they are in. And along the way, He continues to free me from the things that bind me.

Isaiah 61
Good News for the Oppressed
 1 The Spirit of the Sovereign LORD is upon me,
      for the LORD has anointed me
      to bring good news to the poor.
   He has sent me to comfort the brokenhearted
      and to proclaim that captives will be released
      and prisoners will be freed.
 2 He has sent me to tell those who mourn
      that the time of the LORD’s favor has come,
      and with it, the day of God’s anger against their enemies.
 3 To all who mourn in Israel,
      he will give a crown of beauty for ashes,
   a joyous blessing instead of mourning,
      festive praise instead of despair.
   In their righteousness, they will be like great oaks
      that the LORD has planted for his own glory.

 4 They will rebuild the ancient ruins,
      repairing cities destroyed long ago.
   They will revive them,
      though they have been deserted for many generations.
 5 Foreigners will be your servants.
      They will feed your flocks
   and plow your fields
      and tend your vineyards.
 6 You will be called priests of the LORD,
      ministers of our God.
   You will feed on the treasures of the nations
      and boast in their riches.
 7 Instead of shame and dishonor,
      you will enjoy a double share of honor.
   You will possess a double portion of prosperity in your land,
      and everlasting joy will be yours.

 8 “For I, the LORD, love justice.
      I hate robbery and wrongdoing.
   I will faithfully reward my people for their suffering
      and make an everlasting covenant with them.
 9 Their descendants will be recognized
      and honored among the nations.
   Everyone will realize that they are a people
      the LORD has blessed.”

 10 I am overwhelmed with joy in the LORD my God!
      For he has dressed me with the clothing of salvation
      and draped me in a robe of righteousness.
   I am like a bridegroom in his wedding suit
      or a bride with her jewels.
 11 The Sovereign LORD will show his justice to the nations of the world.
      Everyone will praise him!
   His righteousness will be like a garden in early spring,
      with plants springing up everywhere. 

Living in the Bush with people who once prayed for my death

I spent the last week in the Bush with a group of Jehovah's Witnesses. A group that hated me, called me a child killer, wicked American and said that I came to Africa to hurt the African people. I'm sure I don't have any idea of all the horrible things spoken about me.  Why would they say such things?
A member of their family needed medical treatment and I said that God laid it on my heart to help them...

The child in question was 3 years old when we met. I asked the parents if we could take the child to the hospital to see if anything could be done. The answer was yes. After several visits to a local Cameroonian Dr., he decided that surgery was our only option. The mother and father discussed and a message was sent back to me that we could move forward with raising money for the surgery. It was decided that we would wait 6 months for the child's health to improve to be able to tolerate the operation.

During one of our hospital visits, mom told me that the last time she had taken her child to the hospital was when she was a year old. At this time, she was told that her child was being punished for sins the mother had committed and the punishment for both of them was for the child to live this way. Mom hadn't taken her child to a hospital since then. She and I had long discussions about this and how wrong this form of thinking was. I had to tread very lightly because there are "traditional beliefs" in Africa that I just don't understand and you don't want to completely offend people's way of life when trying to introduce Christ to them.  The next day I went back to America.

Flash forward 4 months later... I called back to Africa to wish the family a happy Easter and to check on the birth of the new baby mom should have had a few weeks earlier. I was informed that the baby was stillborn. I wept, I prayed with mom and then spent a lot of time with God asking numerous questions...

What I did not know at the time was that when mom informed their family members (parents, brother's sister's etc) of the pending operation they essentially ex-communicated them. Apparently there is some "doctrine" that JW have that prevent them from doing things with blood...African's also traditionally "ex-communicate" members of their family that bring shame to the family. I don't understand it all and at the time of meeting I had no idea of this families "religious beliefs." We discussed salvation and God's plan for their lives. They gave "all the right answers." This is why relationship is so important. You can't just run through asking questions and spouting off "Christian-ese" to people and expect their lives to be truly changed. People learn to say what you want to hear to "get you off their backs." In this case, mom was terrified that we would not help her child if they didn't believe the way I believed. When the new baby was stillborn, their family blamed me and the parents for agreeing to have the operation. This is where I earned the name child killer. The family was convinced that not only would this child die, but the child having the operation would die as well.

Mom and Dad discussed at length whether to go through with the operation or not. They desperately wanted change for their child but living without family in Africa is beyond difficult to say the least. When your family disowns you, many members of the community do as well and it makes an already hard life one hundred times harder. They ultimately decided to do what was best for their child and move forward. Mind you, I had no idea all of this was going on behind the scenes. It was only after the fact that I found all of this out. 

So our precious child had an operation and it was completely successful. Mom actually got pregnant again shortly after the operation and gave birth to a healthy baby boy. The parents were convinced this was a gift from God and that I was their angel. Her words to me were, "We will never refuse anything you tell us because God sent you to us for a reason. All of this pain and suffering could not be for nothing." While honored with her words, I stressed the importance of God's words being the authority in our lives and His words are the ones we follow.

On my next trip to Cameroon, I learned of all the "drama" that had unfolded the year before. The family had been welcomed back into the lives of their families and no one had an unkind word to say. Shortly after the extended family found out I was in the country, they "called for me." Mom and Dad also insisted that it was important for me to "see their roots" and to know where they were from. Well, you can imagine, I was not thrilled about going and in all honesty, I didn't have the time to travel 8-10 hours away at the time.

This year, I was asked again to go to the Bush to visit the family during their annual family meeting/gathering. I asked why? What is the purpose of me going? God is the one who deserves the glory for the wonderful outcome of the operation. The answer, "They want to know why an American who has so much would leave her country to come and help people she doesn't know?" Well, that changes things a bit. A friend once told me, you pray for doors to be open to share the gospel and when they are opened, how can you refuse? This was one of those times.

So last week, I squished in a truck designed to carry 6 people with 10 people inside and the back loaded with "stuff." We drove from 10 p.m - 7 a.m. this way. Physical pain is all I can tell you.  It was not comfortable, it didn't smell good and I'm sure I have a permanent bruise on my shoulder from bouncing up and hitting the "chicken bar" every time we hit a pothole. If you have ever traveled in Africa, this is about every 15 minutes...

I wasn't sure what to expect but I was welcomed with open arms and shown love that I didn't expect or deserve. For days, people walked from all over the village to be able to meet the "stranger who is not normal." I was able to share the love of Jesus with them. He is the only reason that I can do anything that I do. Their answers to that statement, we know God but many people who say they know God do not do such things. This is where RELATIONSHIP with God makes a difference and listening to the voice of the Lord comes in to play. I certainly don't do any of these things on my own. If I had my way, I would be traveling around the world from beach to beach chilling and planning some serious parties. That was my plan for my life. God had a different one and I am oh so happy that He did.

We talked about the Lord, I taught about physical hygiene and the importance of clean water. They don't have electricity there or any plumbing of any sort. This opened the door to talk about the Light of the world and the Living Water in a way that was not threatening or seemed condemning to them. This particular area of Cameroon is very cold. In the evenings around 10 p.m. someone would start music and we would dance for hours until people were exhausted and ready to sleep. This was both to keep warm and to make you tired enough to sleep through the cold. They had their morning and evening prayers that I did not participate in for obvious reasons. I wasn't sure how that was going to work but they were very respectful. We didn't have any converts on this trip but I have been invited back. I asked if I came back, could I bring others with me to talk about Jesus with the children in the form of Vacation Bible School. The answer was yes... My heart is full and I am overwhelmed. Now we just have to find the right group of people who can withstand the "harsh" conditions and the tough questions.

One could not have told me a few years ago, I would be living in Africa sharing life with people who once prayed for my death. I would have been more surprised to know how much love I would have for them.

People all over the world ask me why I live this type of life. Many times I don't have a very good answer to give. This is one tiny example of why I live this life. Jesus died so that we could all have life and life more abundantly than we could ever ask or think. I'm grateful that He chose me. I'm grateful that He loves and accepts me with all of my flaws and quirks. How can I be selfish and keep that just for me? He fills us up with His love, so that we can share it with others and others will come to know the TRUTH of who He is. What a joy. What a privilege.

It's not always easy. There are days that I cry and many days that I miss my friends and family. There are times that people take advantage of me and I am often misunderstood. There are even days that I want to give up and go home and have a "normal" life. (whatever that is, I never have, nor will be normal) Every time I have my times of tears, I am reminded that Christ went through all of this and so much more. He didn't give up so how can I?

As I reflect back on 2011 with all of it's challenges and happy times, I'm grateful for my life and grateful that God is using me to hopefully change lives all over the world to know and love Him.

Thank you for your prayers, your sacrificial giving and your love and encouragement today and every day. You are a part of all of everything I do. One plants, one waters and God is the one who gives the increase. Continue to allow Him to mold and shape you into a vessel for His use! People all over the world are depending on you! Remember that you don't have to travel to Africa or some foreign country to make a difference. Your mission field is right where you are!

Blessings to you for a wonderful New Year!